Thomas Chandler Haliburton
[1] I had heard of Yankee clock pedlars, tin pedlars, and bible pedlars, especially of him who sold Polyglot Bibles (all in English) to the amount of sixteen thousand pounds.The house of every substantial farmer had three substantial ornaments, a wooden clock, a tin reflector, and a Polyglot Bible.How is it that an American can sell his wares, at whatever price he pleases, where a blue-nose would fail to make a sale at all? I will enquire of the Clockmaker the secret of his success.
[2] “What a pity it is, Mr.Slick” — for such was his name — “what a pity it is”, said I,“that you, who are so successful in teaching these people the value of clocks, could not also teach them the value of time.”
[3] “I guess,” said he, “they have got that ring to grow on their horns yet, which every four-year-old has in our country.We reckon hours and minutes to be dollars and cents.They do nothing in these parts, but eat, drink, smoke, sleep, ride about, lounge at taverns, make speeches at temperance meetings, and talk about ‘House of Assembly’.If a man doesn’t hoe his corn, and he doesn’t get a crop, he says it is all owing to the bank; and if he runs into debt and is sued, why he says the lawyers are a curse to the country.They are a most idle set of folks, I tell you.”
[4] “But how is it,” said I, “that you manage to sell such an immense number of clocks, which certainly cannot be called necessary articles, among a people with whom there seems to be so great a scarcity of money?”
[5] Mr.Slick paused, as if considering the propriety of answering the question, and looking me in the face, said in a confidential tone, “Why, I don’t care if I do tell you, for the market is glutted, and I shall quit this circuit.It is done by a knowledge of soft sawder and human nature.But here is Deacon Flint’s,” said he, “I have but one clock left, and I guess I will sell it to him.”
[6] At the gate of a most comfortable-looking farm-house stood Deacon Flint, a respectable old man, who had understood the value of time better than most of his neighbours, if one might judge from the appearance of everything about him.After the usual salutation, an invitation to “alight” was accepted by Mr.Slick, who said he wished to take leave of Mrs.Flint before he left Colchester.