首页 灵魂也要一席之地

第25章 培养自信 Developing Self-confidence

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Confidence is a feeling-an inner fire and an outer radiance,a basi c satisfaction with what one is plus a reaching out to become more.Conf idence is not something a few people are born with and others are not,f or it is an acquired characteristic.

Confidence is the personal possession of no one;the person who has it learns it-and goes on learning.The most gifted individual on earth has to construct confidence in his gifts from the basis of faith and exp erience,like anybody else.The tools will differ from one person to the next,but the essential task is the same.Confidence and pose are availa ble to us all according to our abilities and needs-not somebody else's-provided we utilize our gifts and expand them.

One of the most rewarding aspects of confidence is that it sits grac efully on every age and level of life-on children,men,women,the famo us,the obscure,the rich,the poor,artist,executive,teen-ager,the o ld.And you can take it with you into old age.There is nothing more ins piring than an old person who maintains his good will,humor,and faith in himself,in others,in the future.Conversely,the root cause of old people's despair is a feeling of not being wanted,of nothing to contri bute,no more to conquer and become.

Most people have more to work with than they realize.One noted phys icist calls this unused excellencies and finding and releasing this pote ntial in ourselves is one of the major challenges of modern life.The gr eat danger is not that we shall overreach our capacities but that we sha ll undervalue and under-employ them,thus blighting our great possibilit ies.

The goal of life is not a problemless existence,which would be unbe arably dull,but a way to handle problems creatively.That word "proble m" may sound a little prickly,but it only means a question put forth f or solution,and actually life consists of a series of problems-and-solu tions,each different from the last.

Confidence is delight-delight in living,in being who you are,in w hat you do,in growing,in the endless and sometimes exasperating advent ure of what it means to be human.The teacher who delights in teaching h as no time for bogging down in a swamp of doubt that he or she is doing it "right",and they are well aware that they can become a better teac her tomorrow,but only by doing their best today and enjoying today.So,too,the mother who delights in being a mother does not worry over-much about whether she fits the rules.She is not the mother,after all,of s omething material but of a living child.